test PP n PM esok.

seorang teman rapat share ini:

dlm hati, "Rugi tak ngorat lelaki ini....hik hik hik hik"

*ok korang boleh sepak muka aku laju laju*

"Tidak salah meluahkan rasa cinta di hati kita. Kalau sudah berkenan, nak buat macam mana. Usahlah dipendam disimpan sampai hidup terganggu dan tak boleh buat kerja. Luahkan, nyatakan, beritahu biar terang. Barulah rasa tenang.

Itukan fitrah, tiada siapa boleh halang.

Tetapi, biarlah diluah pada orang yang sepatutnya. Memberitahu terus terang kepada walinya adalah tindakan paling gentleman dan romantik. Kalau jadi kahwin, comfirm akan jadi kenangan manis sampai mati.

Ramai orang pendam perasaan cinta, kemudian hidup dalam anganan berpanjangan. Layan jiwa katanya. Ramai juga orang, luah perasaan pada anak dara orang tapi sembunyikan dari walinya, kemudian hidup bermain cinta dan larut dalam maksiat entah ke mana.

Sebenarnya, tindakan kitalah yang menentukan salah betul. Jatuh cinta, beritahulah, risik dengan betul, kalau tidak diterima tak mengapa, tidak hilang kemuliaan kita. Kalau diterima alhamdulillah, boleh diteruskan di atas jalan yang sepatutnya.

Cinta tidak salah, asalkan betul cara acuannya."

note to self.

being ups and many down,

being sarcastic and humble,still.

being nice and cheeky,

running.

walking

and suddenly slowing down.

i did not know what exactly am i doing right now,

i hope i am  doing the right thing.

i'm not good enough.

because i don't know everything.

being me is being me.

to inspired people is not a weekend thing.

to inspired people does not involve forcing  and hurting others.

don't plan to hard to make people happy by not being you.

yeah sometimes it works, but most of the time you might hurting yourself and others too.

make people happy being around you is the best part.

adapting into the nature without changing your good attitude. by all mean, be yourself.

but remember, being you is not a license to break peoples hearts.

don't blame others just because you said 'this is the real me'

there is no such a thing as 'the real me' in my opinion lah.

because what you know? because without realising, we keep on changing the way we talk,the way we speak,the way you act with different people.

in example, talking to your mom, and talking to you classmates,

talking in front of the class while presentation, and gossiping while having your lunch.

well, you tend to naturally change the attitude with the environment.

'being you' is how smart you get along with other, or with something without losing yourself.

WHEN YOU ARE DEALING WITH HUMAN, IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY.

#lovemuchos

i am not okay.

balik rumah aku rasa tak best.

assignment banyak.

dan aku rasa hari ahad aku terbuang begitu sahaja.

aku rasa patut,balik je semalam.

esok, perlu ke parlimen.

bermakna, harus meninggalkan 2 kelas.

esok, dua assignment perlu di hantar.

aku masih blur.

macam ini kah MPP?

salah aku juga, tak atur masa dengan betul.

masa kat johor.

aku lupa bawak ubat.

setiap kali baring, aku rasa sesak.

semput.

ya benar. aku sakit sangat.

cuma. aku banyak juga. diam dlm bas dan ketika baring.

sebab aku mengatur nafas.

aku bagitahu sri sahaja, aku takut terjadi apa2,

at least sri tahu.

salah aku juga, tak bawa ubat.

semua salah aku. salah sendiri.

bila aku sesak nafas. aku penat. bila aku penat. aku tak produktif.

yes, i have all the guts to say I'M OKAY.

but i am not strong enough to sustain the energy.

selalu tak nak mengaku diri sendiri sakit.

sebab,

orang akan pertikaikan kebolehan kita buat sesuatu.

boleh ke kau buat ini? itu?

i am a leader. and yet, i feel i am a total loser. useless.

Rasi Ini - Viera

i will be back.

i miss you, little bridge.

i love the new family.

family MPP.

i read up blog kawan2.

they are really someone great.

.....

aku kagum dgn seorang demi seorang.

secara individu mereka hebat.

tak kenal maka tak kenal.

untuk kenal tak semestinya bertanya.

perhati, baca dan beri masa.

actions speak.

.....

sebenarnya, aku layak kah menjadi MPP?

selalu bingung untuk jawab soalan sendiri.

hehehehe

.....

hari ke 8

aku nak update tentang hidup selepas menjadi MPP.

tapi aku karang2 lepas tu aku save tak publish.

rasa tak best.

.....

making decision is tough.

than ever.

dan sekrang ada dua kepala.

dua dua baru.

aku kene hormat dia

dia pun kena hormat aku.

aku akan update.

bila hati tak serabut.

......................

pengalaman ini akan jadi indah. aku akan jadikan ia sebuah pengalaman yg indah.

ini mematangkan aku.

membuatkan diri menjadi lebih baik.

mungkin, segala kesengalan aku Allah yg buang dgn beri tanggungjawab ini.

Aku ingin menjadi lebih baik.

Habluminallah, Habluminannas.

jaga hubungan dgn Allah, Allah akan menjaga hubungan kita dgn makhlukNya. InsyaAllah.

Delima 3

when tough is tough.

i only have 2 options left,

be tough.

or

die.

ho ho ho.

on the way back to college last night,

one of my friend cried.

she said she can not take this anymore.

i let her cry, i was slowing down the speed.

i let her cry. i say nothing. i don't deserve to say anything.

i let her cry. and lend her my shoulder.

maybe she was emotionally disturbed,

she is tougher.

i did not cry, but i still afraid to express the feeling.

she is tough enough to admit the emotion.

...

Last Day. UNITECH QS

I learnt something new everyday.

al kisahnya.

today is my last day of my industrial training.

so, mcm biasa la, i made makan2 for all of the staff.

SPAGHETTIIIIII.......

i choose spaghetti, sebab it's western and most of the people love it.

and i am surrounded with the Chinese.

easy to prepare.

...........

when it comes to lunch hour, i was excited.

they were excited too.

tapiiiiiiiiiii............

Buddhism did not eat beef!

i did not know! :( :( :(

i really hope to treat everyone for lunch today.

half of the officemates did not eat beef.

i was a bit dissappointed with myself.

because i should ask,when it comes to foods.

they always concerns, whether its halal or non halal food whenever they wanted to eat together with us (the muslims)

i do realised today.

this is my first time i am the minority, and out of my comfort zone. the non Malays environment.

i would say it was an awesome experiences.

i should be more sensitive with other religion too,without prejudising mine.

i should be more expose to the non malay culture.

We are Malaysian, should act like Malaysian.

more sensitive towards each other. live harmonically and respect.

one malaysia maa.

peace!

Life is not easy. smile!

yesterday's traffic was bad.

me and thousand of peoples were stranded in the jammed.

Alhamdulillah after 5 effing hours, i was home,

safe and sound.

and hungry.

this is my first time experience something like this

it was heavy rain that caused flash flooding

i heard it was up to 1.5m high.

i was lucky enough, i was not in the flooded area.

thanks to twiiter, and the radio.

i get myself update with the current situation, and the alternative road

that i can use to get myself home.

i am glad that i have the guts and more or less knowledge of reading the legend at the signboard to find the way out.

i like to google the map, and it's really help you know.

............

experiences make you wiser as you get older.

you never know what lies ahead.

what problems you may be facing.

but, i do believe others experiences is also a lesson to be learnt.

sometimes ignorance is not a bliss.

if you think you are not strong and tough, think again.

when tough and strong is the only option you have, you will be amaze.

life may be bumpy and winding,

 buckles up your seatbelt and enjoy the ride!

you may cry and yell to the life, for not being easy thoroughly,

but dont skip any of it.

for how long pun you nak merungut kan?

someday,somehow, the moment will come when all the bitter experiences will taste so sweet.

bittersweet.

Allah made it all perfect.

Have faith. :)

Tulang

dah bertahun2 aku tak kisah pun.

tapi aku rasa dah tiba masanya.

untuk put an end to it.

the gossip.

aku dgn rakan sebaya itu.

ya. kami pernah rapat, rapat.

tapi tak bercinta.

pernah manja2 sikit tapi masih guna aku kau.

mungkin itu salahnya dulu.

tapi aku dan dia yg hentikan kesengalan tu.

ye la kita pun makin besar. perasaan masing2 kita nak tahu mcm mana kan?

aku takut aku suka dia lebih2 so aku stop kan.

senang je aku ckp ngan dia. sebab dia jenis org baik2 senang aku nak faham.

aku tanya dia

"kita rapat2 ni, kau ada perasaan lebih dri kawan ke? sebab aku tak rasa kau rasa mcm tu,aku pun"

dia jawab panjang2, tapi jawapan dia tak lah. memang kitrg kawan.like kawan.
lepas dri tu kitrg kawan juga. rapat juga.

tapi bagus sebab tak la contact sekerap masa dulu2.

fikiran pun masing2 dah matang barangkali.

aku fikir gosip dikalangn kawan2 tu dah lenyap.

bengong, makin menjadi2 pula.

hmmm.

aku tak kisah pun.

tapi sejak minggu lepas, aku mcm terkisah pula.mcm2 jadi. luar dri jangkaan. so aku tak mahu jangka lebih lagi.

i want to put an end to it.

dia pun dah ada someone special.

aku, takda.

aku takut aku tersuka kat dia ke apa ke. kan, mana tahu. bla bla bla

so far biasa je ah lagi,

tak lah aku letak dia kawan high rank ke ape. sama je ngan lain2.

aku juga yg letih nanti.

bukan penggosip. bukan dia.

dia pun satu, baik sgt, senang sgt kena buli.

terima ja org kata ape.

hmmm. tah. apa2 lah. kroooh

aku dah bosan bekerja.lalalalala~



kan?

Rahsia Dia

think straight and positive,

jodoh itu rahsia Allah.

just deal with it with no doubt.

Kun Fayakun.

2117

Many things happened beyond my expectation
for the past few days.

i manage to keep the feeling, rasa itu. sendiri
for myself for so long.

i do shed some tears sometimes,

yes i do.

aku, selalu berlagak tough.
berlagak positif.

mana yang aku boleh tahan aku tahan

mana aku tak boleh, aku nangis.

mana aku boleh ngadu aku ngadu.

mana aku rasa mengadu itu lagi pedih.

aku diam dan menangis.

aku kuat menangis. kuat.

....................

23 ogos 2012.

aku relakan perasaan itu pergi.

biarkan aku sendiri.mencari bahagia.

...................

i never expect this would be such a sedih moment.

Dove

i was uninspired.
what to do?
i am alone.
and i do not mix well.
*sigh*
i would never put the blame on others,
it is because,
from the very begining,
i am the one who made the choices for my own life.
everything comes with options.
worst come to worst,
there are 'yes' and 'no'.
mesti ada punya.

eventhough you are forced to make a decision,
you are the one who carry all the loads.
pilihan untuk dipaksa atau pilihan untuk menolak paksaan.
kau still ada pilihan utk tidak dipaksa,
tapi tanggunglah consequences dia.
kalau kena paksa,result akhir lebih bagus,
kau masih ada pilihan untuk memilih untuk dipaksa.

life don't come with manuals or instructions.
tapi, kita kena ingat yg kita ada panduan.
ada rujukan.

Al-quran dan Sunnah.

wise and intelligent are two different things.
is your choice,
to be wise,
or to be intelligent,
or to be both.
or, not to be both.

your life, your choice.

colorlok

day 9.
i was late,
habis mandi pun dah pukul 6.20am.
at that time, i said to myself, i am screwed.
siap-siap dah pukul 6.37.
dah start enjin kereta, nak reverse check check phone tertinggal.
oh oh. masuk balik rumah ambil phone.
the phone is necessity kot. tak boleh tak ada.
dah ambil phone, jam pukul 6.45. ok jalan. jalan punya jalan dah nak masuk roundabout,
sedar yg entry pass takda. oh oh oh!
nak patah balik ke tak, nak ke tak.
last last patah balik.
cari punya cari.tak jumpa. mana mana?
 aku memang kelam kabut kalau ada barang hilang haisyh.
jumpa! dlm secret pocket handbag lagi satu.
cis.how can i forget.
jam dah pukul 7.04!
7.04 selalunya aku dah lepas dr tol sg besi! hari ni aku baru nak reverse kereta dri rumah kot!!!
freaking out.
nasib aku berjaya menenangkan diri. insyaAllah insyaAllah.
last last aku tempuh jam dgn aman.
sampai jugak before 8.30.bangi-damansara perdana.dapat parking pun baik punye.
Alhamdulillah.
what ever it is, kalau you freaking out. just hadapi dgn tenang.
bila hati tenang,semua pun senang.hihihi.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
aku rasa hananah, mesti tengah pissed off lagi dgn aku.
sebab dia mcm tak nak reply pun whatsapp aku.or dia masih tengah tidur.
ah teruknya aku sebagai seorg kawan.
sebenarnya, aku memang nak teman perasaan dia last week. masa tu memang aku cari masa untuk dia.
lepas waktu kerja.aku nak selit2 jumpa tima hati dia tengah serabut tu. walau aku memang tak dpt buat
apa2 yg menyelasaikan apa apa masalah dia kan. but i want to be there.
just be there.
tapi dia ada berbuka dgn kawan2 imran dia. aku pun dok rushing2 nak balik sume bagai. last last
memang tak dpt jumpa.aku rasa kesal.
lagi rasa kesal sebab, aku nak pujuk dia tapi tak nak pujuk dia.
maksud aku mcm takdalah aku nak kata sabar ya, dugaan hidup cenggini cenggitu.
aku mmg bodoh kot bab nasihat ttg hidup ni.
tapi aku pg ckp aku taknak pujuk kat dia.
mmg patut ah dia pissed off kan.ala.
see, aku sendiri pun tak leh nak advise diri sendiri cara
nak ckp ngan people yg aku syg.pfffttt
so, dia dah stop whatsapp,msg,call aku.
padan muka.
aku sendiri yg close the door of communications between me and her.
silly me.

Setia Sky 88

day 5.
tiba tiba rasa nak kawin.
mungkin sebab tengah kerja pastu ramadhan.
bestnya ada org hantar pergi kerja.
...

dulu aku selalu latih diri jadi independent.
boleh buat semua benda sendiri.
drive sana sini,
tahu jalan sana sini.
ok lah, aku memang dah berjaya buat banyak benda sendiri.
cari kerja sendiri,
drive sendiri.
paling banyak, tentang driving kot.
aku rasa sgt sgt penting ada lesen kereta dan kereta.
tapi bila kereta buat hal, rosak, mengada.
itu aku masih belum boleh rely on myself.
aku tahu guna kereta je.
blrrrgghhhh.

dulu aku selalu fikir,
nanti kalau dah kawin.
aku nak pergi kerja sendiri, nak drive sendiri.
suami pergi sendiri,aku pergi sendiri.
tapi hari ni aku rasa best sgt papa hantar gi kerja.
ah,mula rasa nak tukar fikiran.
kah kah.
nanti nak pergi kerja nak suami hantar.

eleh, setakat praktikal boleh lah pergi hantar balik berjemput.
hello, bila kerja betul nanti, aku memang selalu akan terlibat dgn kerja luar.
meeting, site visit,
site evaluation lagi, inspection dan bla bla bla...
well, tgk keadaan lah,

ape ape pun aku nak ckp having a driving license is a necissity nowadays.
sama mcm telefon.
tak kisah la,you ada kereta ke tak.
but you have to have a licence.
itu je pun point aku.

Husna the Trainee

1.Tempat
aku sanggup dtg all the way from bangi to this place, sebab, ya sebab tempat dia,
i tell you. i love this place, the environment and all. basically parking fee dia mahal gilos.
but, aku parking je kat bahu jalan, dah 2 minggu try, its like ramai je parking situ. tak kena
apa2 so far. ok lah tu kan. menangis sob sob sob kalau kena bayar parking tiap hari sampai belasan ringgit.

2.Pejabat
tingkat 6, ofis menghadap menara mustafa kamal. well, aku dah kata aku suka tempat ini kan?
ofis, lebis kurang la besar mcm kat pakatan dulu. but, everyone ada meja sendiri, ada partition for each.
well, i have my own working space. big enough. own pc with 2 screens.
colleague, emm, there are 14 people. sorang bos, sorang accountant, sorang admin, 10 qs, 1 trainee..hehehehe
11 of them are Chineese. ada dua staf melayu, kak siti n kak nik.
so far, pernah borak dgn kak nik je yg malay ah. kak siti mcm takut je nak borak. tah biarlah. aku yg tak ramah.
budak baru. hik hik hik
sebelah aku miss tan, comel, depan aku lagi comel, miss lee.
admin ni celine mmg busy setiap masa. ke situ ke sini.
well, she help me to adapt masa first week hari tu.*glad*
pantry.oh oh. best. tapi biasa lah pantry.pilih je nak milo,nescafe,kopi,nestum.sume ade.
hahahaha, first week je ah, second week ni dah start puasa
toilet sebersih bersihnya.*glad,glad*
stationaries semua diorang provide, aku dtg dengan sebatang pen je hari pertama, sebab pencil case tinggal kat rumah laiqha.
pen, pemadan,ruler, even calculator baru pun diorg bagi. ah banyak betul, penuh dah laci aku dgn stationaries.hehehe ok tipu.
tak lah penuh. tapi banyak lah.

3.canggih.
aku rasa mcm aku ni org kampung masuk bandar. like seriously, first day aku masuk,
aku dapat entry pass, dah la dpt pc yg ade dua screen,(semua org pun),aku pi tanye miss tan, why there is two screens?
hahahaha, rupanya untuk drawing yg guna auto-cad, briscad. it's easier you know.
dpt drawing dr engineers, boleh terus scale on digital drawing. fuh fuh.
so far aku tak guna lagi scale ruler. hik hik hik.

4.makan.
tak sedap ah makanan kat cafe bawah.emm sehari tu je aku makan kat bawah. masa first day.
the rest aku bawak bekal. makan kat atas je.jimat.aku tak sempat explore pun kedai kedai makan kat bawah tu,
banyak lagi sebenarnya. tunggu lah lepas raya.

5.solat dan waktu rehat
rehat 12.30-1.30, standard lah kan.since ada 2 org je staf melayu perempuan pulak tu,
hari jumaat pun rehat 12.30-1.30, aku tak kisah pun.
it just hari jumaat boleh balik awal sikit, pukul 5.
ramadhan nie lagi syiok, balik kol 4.30. tapi dgn jam kl tu, semalam, sampai rumah pukul 6.30 jugak.
tak kisah, cuma mcm bosan ah duduk dlm jam.hik hok.

solat kat bilik meeting, aku yakin bersih,sebab carpet semua. and memang yakin lah.ok, diorg tak halang nak solat.

6.work load.
aku tak tahu mcm mana sistem kerja diorang sebenarnya. diorang check ke tak kerja aku? aku tak sure.
sebab diorang tak pernah ada trainee. so
diorg treat aku mcm new staff gitu.
cuak juga lah.
hari2 aku ada kena check progress payment, lepas dia print aku check,
lepas aku check dia tanya ada salah tak? aku jawab takda, dia terus sign,
aku pun kena sign sebagai checker.
cuak juga, masa buat pulapol kat pakatan dulu,
punyalah menggeletar aku nak hantar kat abg sham,abg syem masa lepas checking dulu.
ala standard lah kot, lain tempat lainlah environment kan?

7.bahasa
masa first di interview oleh Miss Loh dulu, memang fully english, masuk pun english,
tapi cmpur campur juga ckp. Chinese ckp mandarin kot, sebab aku boleh faham sikit2 sikit je lah.
terima kasih Laoshi! hik hik



so conclusion untuk minggu awal ni, i dont think it is hard to adapt here.
lepas ni nak korek buku mandarin yg entah ke mana tu, boleh ah ckp ckp ngan diorg kan.
lepas ini misi nak borak dgn kak siti.
misi nak borak panjang panjang ngan semua org.
nak gelak gelak. aku jarang dapat environment mcm ni/
duduk dgn chinese.aku jadi minoriti.
so aku nak grab pengalaman yg aku yakin akan jadi manis! wehoooooo.

UQS :)

selama ini aku terlalu selesa barangkali duduk di kalangan bangsa sendiri.

hari ini, masuk minggu kedua, aku praktikal kat company Cina.

well.i dont hold any grudge towards any bangsa pun.

ya,kedaulatan melayu, wasiat raja raja.and so forth.important. aku tahu.

but see them as individual, i don't see why we must hate them,

why we must have a grudge, full of hatred and so on.

asingkan fahaman politik dan sifat ke-puak-puakan dengan nilai kemanusiaan.

asingkan emosi dan rasional

aku okay,
mereka tak hina aku, tak hina agamaku, tak halang aku menjalankan tanggungjawab sebagai seorang muslim.

i would do the same.
*tapi, bulan puasa ni, dorang suka buat air kopi la milo la nescafe lah. time aku ngantuk.

hehehehehehe, i dont see any problem with that.
i am adapting myself.

hitam pekat

aku rasa aku tak layak.

untuk bertanding.

tapi kata teman, tak kisah lah mcm mana pun peluang tu datang,

ia tetap peluang.

jadi, kalau ianya satu peluang, kenapa perlu bazirkan dgn alasan yg sia sia? kan? . :)

jika ini peluang yg dtg sekali seumur hidup,

i'll grab it with both hands and feet.

aku anggap ia perjuangan.

perjuang belum selesai.

belajar terus belajar.

death

i am scared.

i am scared to lose someone that mean the world to me. the family.

sejak dua menjak ini,  minggu ni sahaja, dua kematian melibatkan ibu dan bapa jiran dan teman di universiti.

aku takut.

aku takut.

Ya Allah, tenangkanlah hati kecil ku ini.

....................................................................................

KLCC

tup tup dah nak exam.

busy sangat ke aku?

whatever. hutang assignment constech.esok last hantar.

hhehehehehe.

whatever what ever.

ini blog aku. ini perasaan aku.

...................

i want to get married.

i want to built a new environment.

i want to put a standard to my future life.

i want to create memories that i never thought i would ever imagine.

because i'm gonna mess it up.definitely.

i want to decorate my own house with the husband.

i want us to choose the colour of our dinning hall, the bedroom and the kitchen.

i want to do all the DIY stuff that i always wanted to do as the deco in.

i want to have a space where the husband and me can pray and recite Al-Quran together.

i want to have a book-racks.

i want to have a husband.

i want to cook for the husband.

i want a husband who entirely save my aurat for himself.

i don't need a perfect man to be the husband.

he dont have the muscle? no problem.

he has a flabby stomach? not a problem.

he can't speak french? no big deal.

he only have Perodua Kancil? comel what.no problem.

as long as me and the husband can live well, can live with each other,

and overcome all the differences.

there will always be the way in adapting.

well. me myself have a lot of weaknesses, too many.

i am not perfect.

i'm just hoping that i will fill in the blank for all of 'the husband's' weaknesses with my unique way.and vice versa.

i want to get married.

Senduk

nampak sgt lama tak update blog,

nak karang new post pun rasa weird sikit, layout dah tukar,

rasa macam awkward sikit.

but thats doesnt bother me as much as other things. hahahahaha

hurrmmmm.

my closest cousin will getting married soon.

and i planned to skip the whole week of CLASSES before her solemnization day.

but tengok lah nanti mcm mana.


...................................................

my heart doesnt skip a beat whenever i see you, whenever i talk to you.

it's like never.

tapi terasa zushhh, bila dapat msg, pastu keluar nama dia. what the heck is going on?

ok i know, blah blah blah.

again.doesnt really important.

never been a crush, and i do really hope it will never be.

kawan2 yang baca please do not guess anyone, do not imagine. okie! :P

......................

i want to get married early, kalau boleh before 25. like seriously.

..............................

ini blog aku kan?

ini yang aku rasa.

i am fat, and nobody attracted to me. hahaha mcm mane nak kawin awal. cit.

okay bye.

4041, Ilham

menjaga hubungan antara manusia kadang kala memang payah,

tapi, berusahalah, okay?

bila bertengkar, berselisih pendapat, bertelagah,

jangan hanya pandang ke sisi yang buruk sahaja.

sepanjang berkawan, bergelak tawa, menangis,

takkan lah tak ada kebaikan yang disumbangkan?

betul kan?

perasaan itu adalah benar.

rendahkan egois mu.

Lukisan tak menipu

orang baca buku.

tapi bukan setakat buku

pernah dengar orang baca orang?

i am still the typical women who can be read easily by people.

The April

April

5th :Submit assignment IT

6-8 th : Team Building (PPO) SMF FSPU, Malacca

9th : Survival Mahasiswa , DATC.

10th : Submit assignment 1 - Research Methodology

: Test 1 : Mandarin I

Meeting SEKI - Anugerah Dekan

11th : PUBLIC HOLIDAY, Gerakan Padu Team AD

12th : Presentation : Construction Technology : Solid Structure

13-14th : Team Building PERUBAHAN, Pahang

18th : Anugerah Dekan

20-23rd : Bengkel Pembangunan Laman Wen dan Montaj, Port Dickson

25-28th : Wakil SEKI, Sabah.

21-29th : MIDTERM BREAK

Mencari lagi.

Tudung,

bukan sekadar menutupi,

tapi melindungi.

Ini pendapat aku, yang aku sendiri rasakan.

bila aku pakai tudung, takde nya aku nak pakai baju tak cukup kain.

sleeveless, shorts etc. etc.

tapi tudung sahaja mcm tak cukup.

maksud aku kalau ia sekadar tudung yang sebenarnya hanya lapisan kain membalut kepala lah.

pakai tudung tapi singkat.

pakai tudung tapi jarang sangat.

pakai tudung tapi ketat sangat,

lately,

aku mencuba pakai tudung berlainan saiz ke kuliah, ke luar rumah.

entah, ini memang hanya pendapat aku secara individu.aku tak tahu org lain.

aku rasa layanan org sekeliling juga berlainan.

lebih2 lagi orang asing (stranger)

mereka menghormati, contoh, kalau beli barang, kalau ada baki, selalunya mesti tersentuh sikit kat tangan, bila aku pakai tudung besar sikit, perkara tu mcm tak jadi tau.

bila aku pakai tudung besar sikit,

aku sendiri rasa malu jika pakaian aku nampak bentuk badan ke,

sengseng lengan baju ke.

mcm tu lah.

aku gemuk dan pendek.

so basically memang baju2 aku tu kadang2 menampakkan lemak sana sini. tapi bukan aku sengaja. hahaha

banyak lagi yg aku kena belajar dri hikmah yang telah Allah bagi kat aku.

selama ini aku takut yang aku tak boleh buat.

tapi, selagi kita tak melangkah, sampai bila2 pun kita masih di tampuk lama.

aku ingin jadi berani,

berani jatuh, berani tergolek, berani malu,

untuk.

terus disini, bangun sendiri dan menjadi yg lebih baik.

Layakkah aku untuk mengharapkan seorang lelaki yang baik untuk menjadi pendamping dan pembimbing ke jalan yang benar?

12.2

lebih baik tak tahu dari tahu?

benarkah?

ah, aku tak tahu aku menyesal ke tak sebab perasaan nak tahu tadi.

sekarang aku rasa sebal. sugul.

hidup dalam gelap.

tak produktif langsung hari ini.

....................................

menangis umpama anak kecil.

Al - Mughni

berubah,

ya perubahan.

aku rasa mcm budus bila baca balik blog post yg lama2,

hahahaha separuh tu mengarut habis,

tapi biarlah, semua post berdasarkan perasaan semasa.

someday, aku akan baca balik and see how far aku dah berubah :)

do you want to be the bitter or the better?

i want to be a better person :)

"jgn pandang perkara baik itu kecil. kalau ia ikhlas..akan terus sampai ke langit" H.Razak, 2012

A girl must be patient.

while i was browsing the youtube for Nouman Ali Khan lectures,

i found this link.

so, i downloaded it and feel like sharing it to those who reading this.

"And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard

their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except

what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over

their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers,

their husband's fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers or their

brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their

right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children

who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should not strike their

feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers!

turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss." Surah An-Nur : 31

SONIGEAR

somehow, today i do realised something about myself.

hua hua hua.

i am practically not stupid, i know i have got some good quality trapped inside me body.

but it is trapped,

i always thought that i have no gut and strength.

well,

i guess i am to coward to admit the truth.

because the truth is true enough.

cakap berdekah2 tentang pendirian,

tentang pembelaan,

aku tetap rasa kau tak perfect, no one does nowadays.

tapi tak perlu lah tunjukkan 'puncak kebodohan' secara terang dan nyata.

aku tak sempurna, kau tak sempurna, mereka tak sempurna.

............................

and lagi satu benda.

now i can see why people always said that love is blind.

how 2 people in love can be so silly.

hehehehehe.

OTK 6.0 vs Langkawi

i never thought that making decision is hard.

i never thought it will make me a serious person.like seriously serious.

i tell you, it's no fun of me being in this particular situation.

being big and being a person that people trust comes completely with a very huge responsibility.

and i dont really think i am up to that level yet

not even close.

or maybe not even a little bit.

or not even at all?

Carta Hati

10 short updates

1. exam starts esok, timeline twitter sibuk pasal semua org tak habis study. standard la.student.

semua kena budget.

2. esok alya first day kat SM Sains Selangor. semoga Alya menjadi insan yang berguna. dia sorang je kot adik beradik aku yg dapat asrama penuh. bangga2. well, kalau korang rasa 'biasa lah budak masuk sbp' korang takyah ckp ngan aku. sebab kat family kitorg alya sorang je yg berjaya masuk sbp. hahahaha

3. cara tak kena kacau during study kat rumah adalah duduk study di meja makan kat bawah. nampak serius sikit, padahal update blog. hahahaha padan muka adik2 yg kene tolong house chores. ok tipu. aku kene tolong juga. cuma mcm tak lah buat semua benda kn. :P

4. bila org terkenal sebenarnya, dia dtg dgn pakej tanggungjawab. so, jadi org femes nie susah tau tak? Amalina Che Bakri is trending worldwide kot skrg. Biar lah dia. kalau rasa dia teruk ke ape, korg reflek balik diri sendiri. lagi bagus ke? so kalau rasa jadi femes tu best, fikir sekali lagi, buat baik ke buruk ke, akan jadi trending worldwide.

5. have you ever wondered berapa kos buat sehelai tudung? semalam aku n mama n alya borong tudung kat Ratu. well. price tag kat tudung tulis rm85 , aku beli rm15. aku kata woi...murah gila. but then, mesti die jual ada untung jugak kan? aku beli rm15 definitely dorg still dpt untung, kepada mereka2 yg beli at the original price, berapa ratus kali ganda untung dia dpt? bisnes.

jual brand.

6. well, i love my girlfriends. bukan sebab diorg blanje aku makan celebrate harijadi sebelum waktunya. *ceh,padahal terharu gila beb* tapi sebab mereka membuatkan aku rasa berhenti dgn kesibukan jdi semakin dewasa sekejap. kadang2 aku rasa aku ni mcm tak contribute ape2 pun dlm life dorg. Thanks Allah for granted me with loves from them. Puterians rocks!

7. aku terbaca satu ayat, kat mana tah, kalau nak suruh boyfriend ke suami ke kawan2 ke abg2 berhenti smoke, suruh dorg baca bismillah sebelum hisap rokok. eheh. awesome.

8. ok cita ni maybe dah basi sikit, tapi aku pelik kenapa Ombak Rindu di labelkan sebagai U = tontonan umum. adegan seksual tu mcm banyak. err. and tajuk cerita 'Datin Ghairah'? hahahaha nak beli tiket pun rasa malu nak sebut. "nak datin ghairah dua?" hahahaha well, aku tak pg tgk pun cite tu, in case korang ingat aku pi tgk kan.

9. dulu masa zaman sekolah, aku selalu bayangkan org yg umur 23 thun tu dewasa gila, tapi aku nak masuk 23 ni tak rasa pun mcm ape yg pernah aku bayangkan dulu. ke aku yg tak matang2? hahahaha.

10. permohonan kolej membuatkan aku berdebar2 lah. haisyh. tah ape ape tah aku rasa ni. sebab aku nak duk kolej kalau boleh sampai sem 6! what ever lah. emmm,aku rasa disayangi oleh ramai orang lah, betul ke? ke aku je yg terlebih perasan? =p